Monday, May 26, 2014

Wolverine 2: An Apology for X-Men 3




Whoever did the trailers for X-Men: Days of Future Past should be paid handsomely for their work, because the movie is not anywhere near as cool as the previews would lead you to believe.

You see, the previews would lead you to believe that the story of this installment of X-Men was about more than one character. That it was about something greater than each individual (like Wolverine). That maybe, just maybe, the gravitas we nerds seek for in our superhero movies would finally find its way into an X-Men movie.

But no. This movie is about Wolverine rewriting the X-Men history in order to make sure that the travesty that is X-Men 3 never happened. It's a (not so cleverly) disguised time-travelling reboot that is designed to make us all forget the silliness of the past X-Men movies and give Hollywood a second chance to make money on a franchise they had previously written off. Oh and Wolverine is in it.

To be fair, there are some cool scenes. Quicksilver (recruited by Wolverine) steals the show at first with some superb special effects and a very unique character. Then, once Young Magneto (rescued by Wolverine) enters the picture, he doesn't just steal it back: he absolutely dominates it. Here, in Michael Fassbender as the young, angry, and passionate Magneto, the gravitas all nerds dream of in superhero movies is achieved.

But even with Quicksilver's entertaining 15 seconds of fame, and Young Magneto's epic portrayal of the Dark Side's philosophy for doing good, the movie is painful. And not in a good way. But don't worry: Wolverine is in it. In fact, he single-handedly saves the entire mutant race, prevents a war that claims thousands of lives, and rescues the woman he loves from dying - all in way that makes perfect comic-book science sense (which is to say: none at all).

So thank you Wolverine. Thank you for rescuing one of my favorite superhero franchises. Nerds every where salute you and pray your name each night before sleep, that your animal spirit may watch over them and fill them with courage. What would we do without you, Wolverine?

I don't know - Hollywood will probably never let us find out.


This post published by request of Benjamin Grippppp.